


it's not the end i'll see your face again

by perfect-porcelain (kathleenhasfeelsandwords)



Series: don't forget where you belong [5]
Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Parallel Universe, Crying Grizz, Crying Sam, Goodbyes are hard, Long Distance Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-06-10
Packaged: 2020-04-23 22:53:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19160647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kathleenhasfeelsandwords/pseuds/perfect-porcelain
Summary: It's time for Grizz to leave West Ham and he and Sam have got feelings about it





	it's not the end i'll see your face again

**Author's Note:**

> when you post two one shots in one day you know you're in deep. This is part of a ongoing AU series so I highly recommend that you read the first ones first before trying this one out but hey you live your life by your own rules.

His time in West Ham was coming to an end. He only had so many personal days and they were dwindling down. 

 

It would be lying to say that he hadn’t cried over the past two days leading up to this moment. 

 

First it was in the shower where he had to bite his lip to keep from letting the audible sobs come out, knowing that if he let out one there was no stopping them so he had shampooed his hair, washed his body, and shaved all while silent tears mingled with the steaming water.

 

Then it was in the light of the stars when he and Sam had gone to gaze at them again, it becoming a tradition. Sam was nestled against him and everything was _perfect_. So perfect that he didn’t want to leave this moment. But the thoughts started crawling in and the lump in his throat formed as he thought about leaving this man behind to return to his dream job. 

 

The next time was when he saw Sam’s eyes tear up during their last dinner together. 

 

“This month has been magical.” Sam said as the bustling restaurant swirled around them. He twined his fingers in Grizz’s and gave him a smile that reflected his pain.

 

“I’m glad I came back.” He responded and Sam’s smile became wider but even more sad. 

 

“Are we going to talk about the elephant in the room?” Sam asked.

 

“If you’re talking about Lexie still working in the same restaurant that she did in high school then yes. That’s a major yikes.” Grizz tried for humor and Sam laughed but then his face slowly fell. Grizz’s smile faded. “I guess this is our last chance huh?”

 

“Boston’s not that far away.”

 

“Right, just a short hour and a half train ride.” 

 

But they both knew that it was more than just the train ride. 

 

They had become from different worlds, Sam still staying in the town that raised him and Grizz moving on to bigger and better things. 

 

Grizz brought Sam’s hand to his lips and he gave it a kiss before putting both of their hands back on the table, rubbing his thumb across Sam’s knuckles. 

 

Their time together had felt like both eons and mere seconds. 

 

Eons when he was gazing into Sam’s eyes, and seconds when he thought about what lay in store for the both of them beyond this.

 

It would never be enough.

 

“I’m a little scared.” Sam admitted, looking down at his drink before looking back up at Grizz. “What if this is just a dream and once you leave I’m going to wake up?”

 

Grizz’s expression softened. “If this is a dream I never want to wake up and I don’t want you to either.” He squeezed Sam’s hand.

 

Sam’s eyes fell again and he watched the man practically crumple inside himself. It hurt Grizz to see. He never wanted to cause Sam pain or anguish and here he was, breaking Sam’s heart into tiny little pieces while his own was breaking right along with him. 

 

He sucked in a breath when he watched a tear trickle down Sam’s cheek and he reached over to press his hand to Sam’s jaw, pushing his head up so that he could see more tears brimming in the man’s blue eyes that stood out shockingly against the red. He felt his own tears coming to the surface. 

 

“Listen, people do long distance all the time. I know we’ve only had a month together but it’s felt like a lifetime and I want another lifetime with you. We can make this work.” He urged Sam who let out a choked laugh.

 

“How can you know for sure?”

 

“Because I will bug you every single day and blow up your phone for your affection.” Grizz said, grinning through the tears and Sam laughed again before he leaned against Grizz’s hand before kissing his palm.

 

“Why is this so hard?” Sam sighed.

 

“It means it matters. _You_ matter to me Sam Eliot.” He said fiercely as a tear finally spilled over and ran down his cheek. 

 

They had gone back to Sam’s place for one last night together before Sam was going to drive him to the train station. They held each other in their arms and kissed slow and passionately, sadness seeping through the moans and heated whispers. It was like saying goodbye to someone who was still in front of you.

 

The drive was mostly silent but Grizz held Sam’s hand the entire time, wanting to memorize the calluses and veins so he could think back on it whenever he was feeling sad. He looked out the window at places that were once tied to childhood memories but now had a new connotation of Sam.

 

He saw the courtyard where he and Sam had laughed while getting ice cream and ending up getting it on each other which of course ensued into a ice cream fight.

 

He saw the grocery store where before he would go get things for his mom but now all he saw was him pushing the cart while Sam chose groceries for the dinners he would make the upcoming week.

 

He saw the place where Sam worked as a lawyer and he would visit, bringing him lunch and commenting on how very professional he looked and murmur things that he wish he could do on Sam’s desk before he made Sam blush and force him out of the office before things got out of hand.

 

All these places had been written over with new memories and he thought to himself that perhaps West Ham wouldn’t be such a bad place to live in, but only if it was him and Sam.

 

Sam had to go to work that day but he had called to let them know he would be coming in later than usual. Grizz had chosen a time that would get him back home before lunch.

 

He fiddled with the strap of his briefcase, his suitcase standing at attention next to him as he stood in front of Sam, not knowing what to say.

 

“Guess this is it.” Sam murmured and Grizz nodded and swallowed.

 

“Guess so.”

 

Sam stared at him for a moment before pulling him into a deep hug, his arms wrapping tightly around Grizz’s waist. He leaned back and planted his lips on Grizz’s, everything he wanted to say passing between that pinpoint of contact and Grizz understood. 

 

After what felt like ages, Sam broke off the kiss, lowering himself off his tiptoes and hugged him again, his head resting in the crook of Grizz’s shoulder. 

 

“I love you.” Grizz whispered, knowing that Sam couldn’t hear it or see it. 

 

He sniffed against the onslaught of tears that were starting to form and he kissed the side of Sam’s head before pulling back. 

 

“I’ll text you when I get home okay?” He said as he reached down for his fallen briefcase strap and Sam nodded. He gave him one last haunted smile before turning and heading into the terminal, looking back only once to see Sam still standing where he left him. Grizz waved and Sam waved back before turning to face the world that would be half empty.

 

**grizz** : made it back to my apartment  
 **sam** : good to hear. i still don’t have pictures of the place you know.  
 **grizz** : i’ll be sure to get right on that.

 

His apartment was bigger than Sam’s though not by much. City living was much more expensive and though he made decent money, there was only so many options.

 

Already he found he was dissatisfied with it. 

 

It was too…. _him_.

 

Normally he would be relieved to be back home in a place that was all him and nothing of West Ham save a few pictures in frames of his friends, but now that he had co-inhabited with someone for basically a month the place was entirely too claustrophobic. What once had been his refuge now felt like a cage. 

 

He dropped his briefcase to the floor and sat on the couch and held his head in his hands, squeezing his eyes shut. 

 

Why could nothing be easy?

 

Why couldn’t he live in a world where if he found his prince charming, he could be whisked away to his happily ever after?

 

He rubbed his face and looked up and out the window onto the Boston skyline. Though his apartment was small, he did get great views.

 

He snapped a picture and sent it to Sam.

 

**grizz** : not even close to as great a view as you

 

Sam didn’t respond for a few minutes and Grizz rummaged through his fridge, starting to take out the expired food that he didn’t think he would have had to thrown out when he bought it before he heard his phone ding.

 

It was a picture of a pair of his boxers on Sam’s bed.

 

**sam** : you left these behind. guess you’re gonna have to come back and get them  
 **grizz** : brb on my way right now

 

Grizz smiled to himself and went back to getting his fridge in order. 

 

It would be hard, there was no doubt about that, but he knew that if anyone, he and Sam could do it together.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr @ tedddylupin  
> holla at me with your thoughts and ideas for what you want to see next! I do have a vague outline planned but if you guys give me an awesome idea I wouldn't mind switching it up!


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